American Gladiators Returns

December 11, 2007 – 11:13 am

If you haven’t yet heard, American Gladiators is returning with all-new episodes starting in January. Needless to say, I’m pretty pumped. Your hosts for the new episodes is the absolutely brilliant combination of Hulk Hogan and Lalia Ali. As a kid who grew up in the late ’80s and early ’90s, I’m thinking this American Gladiator revival is just about the best idea in the history of television. “Average Joe” contestants compete in contests of strength and fitness against massive bodybuilders? Sign me right up. I will be setting my DVR to record every episode.

Why This Show is Tougher than Chuck Norris

Fine, maybe it isn’t tougher than Chuck Norris. I heard he once ate a Rubik cube and pooped it out solved. Now, that’s tough. Anyway, the Gladiators are still pretty tough. Much of this toughness comes from their downright awesome names. I’m definitely naming my firstborn “Militia” and getting him (or her) into bodybuilding. That way, when he wants to try out for the show, he’ll have a leg up on the competition. I’m sure the show will still be running in 30 years or so. I also bet the Hulkster will still be hosting.

Of course, as with many memories our generations’ childhood, the other stone-cold awesome thing about the Gladiators was their video game. What better way to feel like you were on the show than to bathe in some of that 8-bit graphic goodness? I know making it through the Eliminator always made me feel like I could do anything. Including going outside and re-enacting my victory run, whilst dominating any and all imaginary Gladiators in the process. Any red-blooded, American male child did this. So, don’t act like you don’t remember. I always wanted to be Blaze. Or Laser. Or was it Blazer? Either way, on a scale of one to fantastic, this video game tipped the scales.

Tainting the Legacy?

My greatest fear is that the new incarnation will taint the legacy of the early ’90s classic. As long as they bring back the classic contests, like Assault, then the new show can’t miss. I know I will be watching when the show debuts on January 6. Will you?

(Note: If you don’t, the Gladiators will come to your house while you are sleeping and hit you with one of their Joust sticks. Just so you know.)

Tags: american gladiators, did they really name one of them wolf, Humor, really sweet tv shows, Television, the hulkster